"i got the wiggly feel"....-juan pierre
I watched A Minute With Stan Hooper tonight, the new Norm MacDonald sitcom....Damnit Norm..i really wanted to like it, i really tried..and i'm not going to dismiss the enitre series on one bad episode, but if that's your Premiere, how do you expect people to keep watching...I sat there and 10 minutes in i was embarrassed.

embarassed for Norm MacDonald, embarassed for Fred Willard, embarassed for the line" Hooper your shredding us like mozzarella" from Willard that has been in the promos for the past 6 months, which A) isn that funny to begin with and B) has been killed by the frequent commercials was C) forced and insulting, coming after a line that did not merit that reaction...

the acting is beyond terrible, the jokes aren't funny, and definitely dont make any sense to the story/scene/context of conversation....Their were a few jokes that didn't suck, but Norm didnt get to say anything halfway funny...Is wasting his comic timing talent and making him just the boring main character the best way to get Norm a prolonged job on tv? and the actress who plays his wife, was simply horrendous, Penelope Ann Miller, yes THE penelope ann miller who played Dominic's mom, Crisp's ex and Detective John Kimble's love interest in Kindergarten Cop, one of the finest movies of all time...



Ok, man, The OC, i dont want to get into following this pretty person melodrama, but sitting and just watching this bullshit and yelling at the tv with my suitemates is a great good time....Marissa's mom is a bitch, what a bitch, she divorces Ian Ziering and wants full custody of Marissa so she can send her to a psychological institute....she blames Ryan for Marissa's accidental/attempted suicide, but Ryan loves her and saved her life...bitch, bitch bitch, i hope she chokes and dies on her fake tears...like they soak up her makeup on the way down her face and go in her mouth and she chokes on the 2inch schalaccking/poisonous makeup...

but her character is just a plain bitch, so its good casting that they found a woman who just looks like a bitch, Melinda Clarke, has been on shows like Charmed, probably playing a witch or some shit...on Xena, as some warrior bitch, CSI, again no doubt a bitch, on Star Trek: Enterprise, as an alien bitch, and in Return of the Living Dead 3, as some dead ogre bitchface... you can check out a few more attractive shots of the bitch we love to hate that FHM took here.

so i'm thinking, shes a bit typecast, but its her fault for looking like a bitch, i bet most people who look like bitches are bitches, and here's why: because even if they are originally nice by nature, (not naughty by..hahhaha o man, nevermind) then people treat them like bitches because they look the part, so to compensate for being treated like a bitch, is to be a bitch...say it with me...self fulfilling prophecy...fucking bitch..



More OC stuff..Ryan and Marissa look like brother and sister, and they are courting each other, and some day, when the show reaches its apex..BAM incest city...and hey, get this marissa, she's pretty hot, the actresses name is Mischa Barton, guess what other charcter was played by little miss barton, The fucking dead girl who was puking creamed corn after her mom was poisoning her, in the Sixth Sense...that crazy little gross girl grew up to be this hot thing, i mean makeup goes a long way, and i'm not saying she really looks lilke she's undead, but she can puke on cue, so she might be a zombie...where is this going?



In NBA news,
the knicks have the "Woo-Hooo" from the Blur song "Song 2", as a crowd pumper upper, but its mixed so that the wooohooo plays three times real fast...this is used when say howard eisley hits a three or Doleac gets his fat white hands on an errant pass....i thought it was worth mentioning, cuz i dunno, its kinda stupid and cool i guess, shut up...anddd who would have thought Van Horn would become the Knicks' offense...its only the first game but damn, New York led Orlando by 10 with 2 minutes left, Van Horn fouls out, after a great night and Orlando goes on a 12-2 run to force OT, and wins the game in the extra period.

Lebron, Lebron...having a game and a half, and Carmelo helping the Nuggets beat the defending champ Spurs.

in the new ESPN NBA times square studio, why is Greg Anthony sitting on Bill Laimbier's lap, these two are sitting so close on one side of the desk that they honestly could be fingering each others' asses without anyone knowing....



I just saw the new commercial for the new incarnation of Napster...i had heard that the name and service had been bought by Roxio, seeing how the Napster name was known countrywide during the peak of the hoopla...and now its back, legal and competing with pay services like Itunes...i dont know, i just thought you might want to know that i saw the commercial...man i am really off today...



Hey the live action Cat in the Hat movie, starring Mike Myers is coming out soon, and I'm excited...But then again, i'm not that excited..see its funny because, I think its gonna be great and about time, YAY and im so happy...but then i think wait, Its Mike Myers and he is hilarious, but hes in a fur and makeup getup with a funny voice so that he's barely recognizeable, in a seussically stylistic children's movie...and this is exactly like the live action Grinch, starring Jim Carrey...all the same ingredients...and if its the same result, well i'll be let down, i dont know what i am expecting, but i couldnt sit through the live action Grinch, and still havent seen the whole thing, so why bother see Cat in the Hat, right? See you talked me out of it, and i should thank you for saving me 9.50...


Norm you're shreading me like mozzarella...or something to the effect of i'd rather take a cheese grater to my face than sit through bad acting, thats not funny bad, just sad